world in hand

Raghupati raghav raja raam , jail ke andar assaraam. saadhu ban ke aise kaam ,qaidi bun ke karo aaraam. dekh liya apna anjaam , hue budhaape mein badnaam . jhoote paakhandee ke naam , saare desh ka hai paighaam.khud ko kehte the bhagwaan , pakde gaye na Zandu baam.... 

Just too good: Ek Baar Santa Ne Socha, Bhagwan Ki To Sab Puja Karte Hain, Kyu Na Mai Ravan Ki Puja Karu.? Ho sakta hai wo free ho aur meri wishes puri karde. He prayed for 1 year... After 1 year, Raavan uske samne aaya... Ravan: Vats main tumse khush hua..3 vardaan maang lo... Santa: Nahi mujhe 100 vardan chahiye. Raavan: Vats main kewal 3 de sakta hu.., lena hai to le nahi to maa chuda. Santa: (ek minute sochkar) accha aapke hath me jo gada hai vo danda ban jaye. Raavan: Tathastu, ab dusri wish bolo? Santa: Is dande ko apni gand me daal lo, andar tak... Raavan: (confused) Tathastu, ab jaldi se tisri mang bhenchod bahut dard ho raha hai... Santa: Smiles & says, bhosdi ke, ab bol baki 97 wishes dega ya fir is dande ko andar hi 'Gada' banwa du...: u

Just too good: Ek Baar Santa Ne Socha, Bhagwan Ki To Sab Puja Karte Hain, Kyu Na Mai Ravan Ki Puja Karu.? Ho sakta hai wo free ho aur meri wishes puri karde. He prayed for 1 year... After 1 year, Raavan uske samne aaya... Ravan: Vats main tumse khush hua..3 vardaan maang lo... Santa: Nahi mujhe 100 vardan chahiye. Raavan: Vats main kewal 3 de sakta hu.., lena hai to le nahi to maa chuda. Santa: (ek minute sochkar) accha aapke hath me jo gada hai vo danda ban jaye. Raavan: Tathastu, ab dusri wish bolo? Santa: Is dande ko apni gand me daal lo, andar tak... Raavan: (confused) Tathastu, ab jaldi se tisri mang bhenchod bahut dard ho raha hai... Santa: Smiles & says, bhosdi ke, ab bol baki 97 wishes dega ya fir is dande ko andar hi 'Gada' banwa du...: u

This is strictly veg joke Ek baar Teacher k Blouse k do Button khule dekhkar Sandeep or Anand hasne lage. Teacher boli: Hasna bandh karte ho, Ya nikalu bahar Dono ko.? Jaldi fwd karo Mkt me Naya hai... 😛😛 Son of Sardar : Papa apko Raste me 100 & 500 ka Note pada huva mile to aap konsa uthaoge ? Sardar : Of course Beta 500 ka ? Son : Isi liye hum Sardaro pe joke bante hai... gujrathi hota to Dono utha leta..!                           Boy - papa ghar pe meheman aaye hai, sharbat banane ke liye nimboo nahi hai, kya karu Dad - aare darta kyu hai, new vim bar  mein 100 nimboo ki sakti hai... Da...

Rahul Gandhi Ki Car Se 'Kutte Ki Maa' Mara Gayi...! Rahul Gandhi driver se: "Jao iske pati ka pata karo..." Jab driver wapas aaya to uske haat main mithai ke dabbe aur gale mein dher sari phoolon ki maalayen thi...!!! Rahul Gandhi : " Ye kya hai..." ??? Driver: "Sir,logon ne meri poori baat hi nahi suni aur khushi khushi haar pehnane lage...Aur Mithai baatne lage..." !!! Rahul Gandhi : "Magar kyu..." ??? Driver: "Maine to sirf ye kaha tha ki Main Rahul Gandhi ka Driver Hoon; Kutte Ki Maa Mar Gayi Hai..." !!!

 ROCKING GENERATION "KID FAILS IN EXAM" Father : Aaj Se Mujhe Papa Mat Kehna.! Son:- Oh, come On Dad, It Was Just A 'School Test'     Not A "DNA" Test.! 😅

सब आशाराम आशाराम करते रह जाओगे और पता भी नहीं चलेगा कि कब 500 टन सोना अमेरिका चला गया"..... आशाराम बापू के चलते कितने मुद्दे दबाये मीडिया ने फ़ूड सिक्यूरिटी बिल, भूमि अधिग्रहण बि...

  .,*""*dil*""*.,   * me Rehne *   "*. Wale,  .*"          "**"   Doston KO       .*""*.*""*. *      Dil       * "*.  Se    .*"       "*.*" GOOD   NIGHT

djpunjab.com

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Whatsapp chat group of indian cricket team...... Ishant sharma (after the match texting on d group): hey guys wassup ?? Dhoni : dimaag ki maa mat chod maderchod...pehle hi teri vajah se meri innings ki ijjat ki chud gayi lavde sale chutiye......tere sab baal katke tere gand mein daal dunga bc ! Tu bus ab mujhe ake bol ki mujhe team mein lelo tere lavde ko stump banake stumping ki practice karunga bc...! Ishant sharma : mein toh yeh bolne text kiya tha ki mein retire ho raha hu ! Kohli : jaa gand mara na fir lavde...! Kabhi dikh gaya na udhar hi gand mein bat ghusa dunga tere ! Bhuvaneshwar kumar : sirji.....apki maka bhosda ! Rohit sharma : ishant plz itna toh mein bhi nai hagta hu chutiye ! Siddhu joined d group.. Siddhu : ishant teri maki chut ! Siddhu left d group... Ishant sharma : are meri baat toh suno koi.....mujhe maaf kardo mein retire hone ja raha hu ! Sirf next match khelne do i would rock it on ! Bhvaneshwar kumar : sirji firse......apki mak...

1 Girl Interview dene gayi, BOSS: batao wo kia cheez hai jis k 2 wheel hein? GIRL:Motorcycle, BOSS:Nai Honda MotorCycle. BOSS:batao wo kia cheez hai jis k 4 wheel hein? GiRL:Car BOSS:Nai, Toyota Car. BOSS:Wo Kia Cheez Hai Jo Time Btati Hai? GiRL:Watch BOSS:Nahi Rolex Ki Watch GiRL ghussey se ab mere sawal ka jawab do, Aagay baaal peeche baaal beech mein sooraakh? BOSS: Hahahahahahaha... Phhuddi...! GIRL:Nai, Teri Bhain di Phhuddi

Jodha  ke bade boobs  dekh kar tansen ne birbal se kaha : yar ek bar jodha ke boobs chuswa de , 1000 asharfia dunga. Birbal ne jodha ke bra me 2 boond khujli ki dawai daal di. Jaise hi jodha ne bra pehni, khujli suru ho gayi. Akbar ne birbal se ilaaj pucha. Birbal : agar kisi surile gale wale se chuswa do to zeher nikal jayega. Akbar ne tansen ko boobs chusne ka hukm diya. Tansen ka kaam ho gaya. Next day birbal ne asharfia mangi, Tansen taal gaya. Birbal : mujhe pata tha madarchod ki tu aisa hi karega isliye dawayi ki 4 boond akbar ki chaddi me bhi daal di hain. Bhen ke lode, taiyaar reh, abhi bulawaa aata hi hoga... 

There was a couple who had thier relationship since 5 years. They loved each other a lot. The girl was beautiful and the boy was faithful. One day, the girl came to the boy and showed her new pink eye lenses. Withing a moment the boy fainted and fell on the floor. The girl rushed him to the hospital. Special team of doctors started operating the boy. After waiting for 37 hours, the girl met the doctor. The doctor said, "We have found alcohol in your friend's heart." The girl got shocked and said, "But he never ever had a drink in his life, how can this be possible?" Doctor, "Even we are going to research on it. You go to your home now, you can visit him tomorrow." The girl hired a taxi and started thinking about the incident. Then suddenly she heard the song playing in the taxi: Gulabi aanken jo teri dekhi, Sharabi yeh dil ho gaya. Kya hai na whatsapp free hai, toh logo ko kuch bhi bhejo bohot interest se padhte hai  Send it to your friend...

Must reply   Please dont spoli da fun! Send this to all ur contacts & see what they do for u   Look at the month you were born in and whatever it says you must do for me 📅😋 📆 January-describe me in a line  📆 Febuary- Answer TRUTHFULLY, would u date me?  📆 March- Tell me one thing you wouldnt change about me  📆 April-rate me out of 10 fr looks 😎💯 📆 May- One word for me 🔤 📆 June- Take a picture of yourself and send it to me 🔆 📆 July- Write a cute paragraph for me  📆 August- BBC me ur biggest. Secret 📦 📆 September- tell me ur.crrnt  crush name  ...

There was a couple who had thier relationship since 5 years. They loved each other a lot. The girl was beautiful and the boy was faithful. One day, the girl came to the boy and showed her new pink eye lenses. Withing a moment the boy fainted and fell on the floor. The girl rushed him to the hospital. Special team of doctors started operating the boy. After waiting for 37 hours, the girl met the doctor. The doctor said, "We have found alcohol in your friend's heart." The girl got shocked and said, "But he never ever had a drink in his life, how can this be possible?" Doctor, "Even we are going to research on it. You go to your home now, you can visit him tomorrow." The girl hired a taxi and started thinking about the incident. Then suddenly she heard the song playing in the taxi: Gulabi aanken jo teri dekhi, Sharabi yeh dil ho gaya. Kya hai na whatsapp free hai, toh logo ko kuch bhi bhejo bohot interest se padhte hai  Send it to your friend...

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕 Zara sa muskura dena diwali se pahle-2  Her gum ko bula dena diwali se pahle-2  Na socho ki kiss kiss ne dil dukhaya.  Sabko maf kar dena diwali se pahle-2  Kya pata fir mauka mile na mile is liye dil ko saf kar lena diwali se pahle-2.  Ho sakta hai kal ham rahe na rahe. Is liye DIWALI ka shubhkamna diwali se pahle-2...

There was a couple who had thier relationship since 5 years. They loved each other a lot. The girl was beautiful and the boy was faithful. One day, the girl came to the boy and showed her new pink eye lenses. Withing a moment the boy fainted and fell on the floor. The girl rushed him to the hospital. Special team of doctors started operating the boy. After waiting for 37 hours, the girl met the doctor. The doctor said, "We have found alcohol in your friend's heart." The girl got shocked and said, "But he never ever had a drink in his life, how can this be possible?" Doctor, "Even we are going to research on it. You go to your home now, you can visit him tomorrow." The girl hired a taxi and started thinking about the incident. Then suddenly she heard the song playing in the taxi: Gulabi aanken jo teri dekhi, Sharabi yeh dil ho gaya. Kya hai na whatsapp free hai, toh logo ko kuch bhi bhejo bohot interest se padhte hai  Send it to your friend...

Raat shubah ka intjar nahi karti, khusbu mosam ka intjar nahi karti jo bhi khushi mile jio shan se,kyonki jindgi waqt ka intjar nahi karti.

Saflata ek khel h. .Isse ap jitni jyada bar khelenge utni jyada bar jeetenge, aur jitni jyada bar jeetenge, utni achi tarah se khelenge.

Jo pal-pal jale wo"ROSHNI" Jo pal_pal mehke wo"KHUSBOO" Jo pal-pal dhadke wo"DIL" Jo pal-pal yaad aaye wo"AAP" Aur jo har pal yaad kare wo"HUM".

Saflata ek khel h. .Isse ap jitni jyada bar khelenge utni jyada bar jeetenge, aur jitni jyada bar jeetenge, utni achi tarah se khelenge.

Arz hai- Jaldbazi me Shadi karke sara jivan bigaad loge Wah! Wah! Jaldbazi me Shadi karke sara jivan bigaad loge. Soch samaj K karoge to bhi kya ukhad loge.!!                    Gd.night

Mushkil hai is yari ko bhula pana. Mushkil hai apko yadon se mita pana. Aap ek keemti tohfa ho dosti ka. Namumkin hai is tohfe ki keemat chuka pana. gud evening

Mere MOBILE k acident hogya hy Wo "SAMSUNG" Hospital k"MOTOROLA" Ward me hy "DR.NOKIA" k kehna hy k SMS ki botle chaye Plz SmS kro mera MOBILE "ICU" me hy. (A jain .........d)

Khuda bhi na jane kaise dorishte bana deta h,anjano ko dil me basa deta h,jinko hum kabhi jante bhi na the,unhe jaan se bhi pyara bana deta h.....

ंदू राष्ट्र हैपप्पू ---टॉयलेट के पिछ्वादेसे तो अपनी गली में तू कुत्ता होते हुए भी मिमियान रहा है अगर मर्द का बीटा है तो १ बार असली शेर मोदीजी को आके १ ही बार मिल पर १ बात पहलेसे ब...

Acchi Baat to Sabko Acchi Lagti hai dosto............... . . . Lekin . . Jab Tumhe Kisi ki Buri Baat bhi acchi Lage to Smjho k....... Tumhe Pyar . . . . . Nahi hua hai, ZALEEL hone ki Aadat ho Gai hai..

Boobs ki aatmktha Mera janam 12 saal baad hua, Jab mai bilkul choti thi, tab my frock me soti thi Fir mere aakar ka vistar hua, Nimbu badh k Anaar hua Jab my badne lagi, Har kisi ki nazar mujh pe padne lagi Hua fir Bra mera ghar, Ab Lagne laga mujhe darr Jab mera size hua bada, Jane kitno ka hua khada Bheed me Ladko ne hath mara, Muje ehsaas hua bahot Pyara Fir na jane kitno ne dabaya, Sach kahu to bada mazaa aaya Kisi ne pyar se sehlaya, Kisi ko pyar se chusvaya. Kisi ne mujhe masal diya, kisi ne mujhpe Apna Popat ragad diya. Ab Jab my gayi jhool, Sare madarchod mujhko gaye bhool... Haso mat saalo forward karo ... Naya hai 

Murgi anda deti hai,aur gaai dudh deti hai,to aisa kon hai jo dudhbhi deta hai,auranda bhi deta hai?.........DukandarDont clap plz . .I know am genious

Ek Randi apni chut mein dettol laga rahi thi... Uski dost ne pucha: Behen, yeh...kya kar rahi ho...? Randi boli: Kuch nahi, bus yuhi... Diwali ki saaf safaai...

Bankok special... .. .. . Ek baar ek aadmi BANGKOK jaa raha tha.. uski wife ne.. naa chaahte huye bhi usse jaane ki permission dedi... Jis din wo ghar se nikal raha tha.. jaate jaate usko wife ne bulaaya aur 12 condoms ka packet dekar boli.. "isse rakh lo mann ho gaya to .........." Aadmi😎 khush ho jata hai aur 😋 sochta hai.. "waah kya biwi mili hai..." Achaanak uski wife awaaz de kar usko fir bulati hai aur kehti hai..🙋 "ruko, usme se 2 mujhe de do.., kahi mera mann ho gaya to ........." ....... ....... ....... Trip Cancelled

अध्यापक: तेरी शिकायत आई है कि तू गाली बहुत देता है। पप्पू: घंटा! बहनचोद! मैंने किस चूतिये को गाली दी? पता नहीं किस मादरचोद ने आपकी गांड में ऊँगली की है सर! वो बहन का लौड़ा अगर साम...

Read Care Fully and Circulate in your friend circulate --Very Dangerous media ने कभी ये बताया ??nestle कंपनी खुद मानती है कि वे अपनी चाकलेट kitkat मे बछड़े के मांस का रस मिलाती है ! और सबका धर्म भ्रष्ट कर रही है !यहाँ click कर देखे!http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=450624644978551&set=a.137060829668269.14827.100000930577658&type=3&theater...

एक माँ अपने 6 साल के बच्चेका फोटो खिंचवाने के लिए फोटो-स्टूडियो लेकर गई.फोटोग्राफर बच्चे को पुचकारते हुएबोला – “बेटा, मेरी तरफ देखो … इस कैमरेसे अभी कबूतर निकलेगा !” बच्चा -“...

'C O N D O M S' ========== Imagine If All The Top Brand's Start Selling Condoms, They Won't Even Have To Change Their Tag Line.. ========== 'Pepsodent' Condom: Raat Bhar Dishum Dishum.. ========== 'Colgate' Condom: Ye Hai Hamara Suraksha Chakra.. ========== 'Nokia' Condom: Connecting People.. ========== 'MRF' Condom: Extra Rubber Extra Mileage.. ========== 'Moov' Condom: Ah Se Aha Tak.. ========== 'Mirinda' Condom: Zor Ka Jhatka Dhire Se Lage.. ========== 'Godrej' Hair Dye Condom: Kato Kholo Aur Lagao.. ========== 'Sprite' Condom: Bujaye Only Pyaas Baki All Bakwas.. ========== 'Tata Sky' Condom: Isko Laga Dala Toh Life Jhingalala.. ========== The Best One.. ========== 'M-Seal' Condom: Ek Tapakti Boond Aap Ki Kismat Badal Sakti Hai...!!!

Girls ki Upar ki Sab Cheez 'B' se Shuru hoti hai. Blouse Bra Bikini B_ _bs Aur Niche ki 'P' se... Peticot Panty Period Pu_ _ y. Is liye admi ko b.p ki bimari hoti hai ..

1 bar 1 kutta jungle me rasta bhul gaya tabhi waha sher aa gaya kutta dar gaya Paas me kuch sookhi haddiya padi thi. Kutta haddi chusne laga aur bola-wah sher ka shikaar karne me majaa aa gaya par pet nahi bhara 1 aur mil jaye to majaa aa jaye. sher ne socha ye to bahot khatarnak kutta he .sher waha se bhag gaya... Upar ped pe bandar betha tha usne socha k abhi kutte ki gaand marwata hu... Wo waha se sher k piche bhaga sach batane k liye usne sher ko bataya k kaise kutte ne use chutiya banaya... Sher bola abhi kutte ki gaand maarta hu dono fir se kutte k paas aaye... Kutta unhe dekh k fir haddi choosne laga aur bola- saale madarchod bandar ko bheje 1 ghanta ho gaya 1 sher nahi fasaa k laa saka. Sher bola bhen k lund bandar meri maa chudwana   chahta tha aur sher us bandar ko kha gaya moral- udta teer apni gaand me loge to gaand tumhari hi maregi.... Zindgi me chahe kuch bhi ho hamesa 100 kadam "SAAND" se 200 kadam "RAAND" se Aur 500 kadam "BAAWL...

8 Baate 8 Baato Ko Khatm Kar Deti Hai: Sorry - Galti Ko. Dukh - Zindagi Ko. Gussa - Rishte Ko. Jhuth - Vishwas Ko. Saath - Gam Ko. Dhokha - Pyaar Ko. Facebook - Career Ko Whats app - Time Ko. Whatsapp ek masti hai Call se sasti hai Neend ko udati hai Khoon ko badati hai Dimag ko pakati hai Par kuch bhi ho ek doosre ki yaad to dilati hai Ek shayari Whatsapp k liye... Awesome read this: Sharifon mein koi chor nahi hota, khwabon me koi aur nahi hota, library me koi shor nahi hota, sawan me aajkal 'mor' nahi hota Par ek baat ki guarantee hai Guru... hamare WHATSAPP GROUP mein jo rahe woh life me kabhi bore nahi hota..  Ye Sms Soch samjakar padhana- 3-CHIZE ZINDAGI Me1 Baar Milti Hain- 1.MAA-BAP 2.WAQT 3.DOST 3-CHIZE SOCH-SAMAZ Kar Uthao- 1.KADAM...

Poor tortoise A Suicide Bomber enters a Pet Shop n Shouts - Every1 has a Minute to get out!!! >=) Tortoise - yeh kya Chutiyagiri hai bhenchod!!

Ram's SMS to Sita-★-★ "Dear Situ, What's up ? Main yaha mast hu & hope tu bhi Jhakaas hogi, Laxman tujhe miss karta hai.. Yaar tu tension na le, Main bahut jaldi tujhe Ravan ke yaha se le jaunga. Maine BSNL ka sim liya hai aur Ravan ka no. free karwa liya hai.. Ravan ko maine mobile par bahut sunaya.. Usne ye bol ke phone kaat diya ki battery low hai. So main tuje micromax ka 30 days battery dual sim wala mobile aur 1 GB memory card sad songs bhar k Mr. Hanuman k hath bhej raha hu. Isme net surfing bhi hai. Ab hum tum video calling ke maze le payenge, Laxman top up card lene gaya hai.. Aur haan maine Vibhishan ko Facebook pe add kar liya hai. Lanka me kya ho raha hai, Wo sab status update kar deta hai. Chal baad me chat karenge Bye...★ Love u... Ur Ram! :- -★ Market me naya aaya hay ramleela ke season main forward Karo. .....★-★-★-★

एक मुल्ला बकरीद के दिन बकरा काट रहा था, बकरा हंसने लगा, मुल्ला बोला, मैँ तुझे काट रहा हूं, और तू हंस रहा है,?? बकरा बोला - ये सोच कर हंस रहा हूं कि मैँ तो जिँदगी भर घास खाता रहा, फिर भी ...

Height of Kaminapan: A boy listening to extremely sad song and thinking.. . . . . . . . . Kaunsi wali ko yaad karu yaar!!

DOSTO भाजपा की पहली सूचि फाइनल राजस्थान बीजेपी के प्रत्याशी ================ इनमें वसुन्धरा राजे झालरापाटन (झालावाड़), राजेन्द्र राठौड़ चूरू डॉ. दिगम्बर सिंह कुम्हैर (भरतपुर), वासुदेव देव...

एक लड़के ने अपनी गर्लफ्रेंड को फोन किया तो उसके पापा ने उठा लिया, लड़का मन मे बोला हे भगवान ये कहाँ से आगया, Dad: हैलो, कौन बोल रहा है? Boy: मैं अमिताभ बच्चन बोल रहा हूँ "कौन बनेगा करोड़पति" स...

सब आशाराम आशाराम करते रह जाओगे और पता भी नहीं चलेगा कि कब 500 टन सोना अमेरिका चला गया"..... आशाराम बापू के चलते कितने मुद्दे दबाये मीडिया ने फ़ूड सिक्यूरिटी बिल, भूमि अधिग्रहण बि...

Gutthi - cricket cricket - Match Match - Team Team - India India - Australia Australia - Bda Score Bda score - India India - asan jeet Asaan jeet - khusi khusi - sidhu paji sidhu paji - Thoko tali... Australia ne sumjha India ko ullu.. Australia ne sumjha India ko ullu . . . . . 359 runs banaakar bhi kya mila BABAJI KA THULLU..

एक टपोरी ICICI बैंक में गया और बोला ~  बहनचोद मेरे को A/C खोलना है , लेडी :- तमीज़ से बात कीजिये , आदमी : तमीज़ की माँकी चूत अकाउंट कौन खोलेगा,वो बता ! लेडी मैनेजेर को कंप्लेंट करने गई , मैनेज...

आज से 21 वर्ष पहले मनमोहन सिंह ने कहा था कि उदारीकरण और वैश्वीकरण के परिणाम 20साल में देखने को मिलेंगे! परिणाम आज सामने है 1991 में 67टन सोना गिरवी रखा गया था और आज 2013 में 500टन सोना गिरवी र...

10 Bestest jokes.... 1. Ek Ladki Ka Birthday Tha. Uske Boy Friend Ne Pucha: “Bolo Tumhe Kya Gift Chahiye?” Ladki Apni Aankhon Mein Pyar Bhar Ke Boli: “Janu, Koi Esi Cheez Do Jo Tum De Sako Aur Mein Le Na Saku” Ladka Apni Pant Utar Ke Bola: “Le Meri Gand Mar Le“ 2. Teacher: “Transparent Word Ka Example Do” Pappu: “Aapki Dress Mein Se Red Bra Dikh Rahi Hai” Teacher Gusse Se: “You Bloody, Kuch To Sharam Kar” Pappu Masumiyat Se: “Mam, Tabhi To Nahi Bola Ki Panty Bhi Fati Hui Hai.“ 3. Jab Kisi Ka Accident Ho Jata Hai To Alag Alag Desh Main Log Kis Terha Xpression Dete Hai U.S.A.: “Oh My God!” Pakistan: “Ya Allah!” Africa: “O La La!” Australia: “Got A Hit!” Aur India: “Maa Chud Gayi Behan Ke Lode Ki Aur Chala Tez“:D 4. BF aur GF dono hass rahe the tabhi GF achanak se chup ho jati hai. BF : Kya hai? GF : Kuch nahi BF : Batao na ...